You are currently in: Jokes. Skip to site menu.


What Are You Thinking?

What am I?

This useful tool, commonly found in the range of 8 inches long.
The functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes.
Is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action.
It boasts of a clump of little hairy things at one end and small hole at the other.
In use, it is inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements.
Anyone found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements.
When finally withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from its long glistening shaft.
After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much less.

What am I?

My First Time

The Moon was full,
The night stood still,
I walked to her
And felt the night’s cold chill.
I looked in her eye,
And held her in my arms,
I was ready for her now,
Ready for her golden charm.
I loved her a lot,
And I cared so much,
It seemed like she
Was much more than a crush.
I knew it was time,
So I took off my shirt,
I touched her soft breast,
And saw the white soft squirt.
I had a good time,
During that passionate night,
The rest I can’t tell,
But do it again,
I might.
It was my first time,
It’s all over now,
It was my first time...

I Really Love It

I was scared at first.
It was very big, and very long, and it angled straight up.
I decided I had to try it once.
I slowly and carefully eased myself onto it.
It felt weird at first.
Then I got used to it.
I went up and down, and up and down on it.
I was really loving it...

What Is It?

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a long one,
Brad Pitt has a short,
Madonna does not have,
Pope don’t use it,
and Clinton uses it all the time....

What is it?