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Redneck Haiku

Beauty

Naked in repose
Silvery silhouette girls
Adorn my mudflaps

Remorse

A painful sadness
Can’t fit big screen TV through
Double-wide’s front door

Options

Unemployment’s out.
Hey, maybe I can get on
Disability

Blaze

Distant siren screams
Dumb-ass Verne’s been playing with
Gasoline again

A New Moon

Flashlights pierce darkness
No nightcrawlers to be found
Guess we’ll gig some frogs

Exuberance

Joyous, playful, bright
Trailer park girl rolls in puddle
Of old motor oil

Alone

Seeking solitude
Carl’s ex-wife Tammy files for
Restraining order

Desire

Damn, in that tube-top
You make me almost forget
you are my cousin

Offerings

Tonight we hunger
Grandma sent grocery money
To Jimmy Swaggert

Drama

Set the VCR
Dukes of Hazzard Marathon
At 9 O’Clock

Deprived

In Wal-Mart toy aisle
Wailing boy wants ’rassling doll
Mama whups his ass

No Signal

White noise, buzzing static
Call Earl; satellite dish
needs new descrambler

Impounded

Sixty-five dollars
And cyclone fence keeps me from
My El Camino

Gathering

In early morning mist
Mama searches Circle K for
Moon Pies and Red Man

Pride

Grinning, he displays
The nine hundred beer cans
Filling pickup bed