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From My Life...

Still Healing (2001.04.30)

This is the end of April. At the end of January I had my cyst operation. February, March, April—three months of healing. Three months of healing and I still have an open wound.

I haven’t been writing much here because I haven’t had much to say. But now I return to work once more. This time lying down on the floor with the computer on the floor also. I’m level with the computer, which makes it easy to type and work while lying down (and lying down makes my healing easier).

Saturday Judy heard from someone that it might help my wound heal quicker if I were to think positive and visualize all the things I would be doing if my wound was healed. I couldn’t. I’ve had this open wound for so long now that it even exists in my dreams (I have dreams where I try not to sit down because of the wound). So to help me visualize, Judy described a Sunday for us without my wound.

First we would wake up late and take a shower. Then we would drive up A1A to the Holiday Inn in Highland Beach. There we would get a table by the window looking out onto the ocean and order the breakfast buffet. We would get our orange juice and head up to the buffet. Judy described all the wonderful food. Bagels with cream cheese, bacon, scrambled eggs, eggs benedict, hash browns, omletes, fresh fruit, and brownies for desert. We would eat plate after plate of their delicious buffet while sitting there and watching the ocean.

Then when we were done we would drive back home and rest on the couch watching tv until our stomachs were no longer aching from so much food. Later we would get dressed and leave once more. We would go to Mario’s of Boca for dinner. I would get the lasagna and she would get a seafood dish. And while we waited for our dinner we would snack on salad and their wonderful garlic rolls. We would have a delicious dinner and then get back in the car to go to the movies.

At the movies we would arrive even forty-five minutes before the movie would start so that we would have enough time to park and get a great seat. And we would sit there for so long while people piled into the theater and we would make fun of the same advertisements that they show over and over again. When the lights dim we would lift up the arm rest between us to get comfortable in each others arms and watch the movie begin.

After the movie we would still sit there snuggling until the crowd of people had left. Then we would stroll out of the movie theater and return to our car. We would drive home and get ready for bed. Then we would go to bed, and I would fall asleep lying on my back.

I can’t wait for this wound to heal, for me to return to my life, and for that Sunday to happen.

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